My little perverts!

Let me first begin by saying I love men! I always have, I always will. I have a wonderful father, wonderful brothers and a wonderful husband! All my best friends growing up were always guys! My favorite teachers were always guys! Each one of my girlfriends from Pullman is married to a really good man. (except Andrew of course) Most of the Army men I know are awesome. However, having said that guys are universally perverts. I have often found my self wondering why is it that guys are perverts? Well I now have two little boys. I am fast learning that boys come hard wired to be perverts!

The other day I was talking on the phone when I walked out to my back deck. As I looked down from the deck I was on, to the deck below me I saw my little boys. Both of which were laughing their little heads off. As I looked down I realized my oldest son Abraham had his pants down, hips out and was peeing off the back deck on to the ground. Both he and his younger brother Dallin thought this was a total hoot! The dog then started licking and sniffing the fresh little boy pee that was on the ground.

Today as we drove around Anchorage I took some time to listen to the conversations going on in the back seat. I heard Abe explaining to Dallin how much fun it is to pee into the dirt and make mud. They both began to laugh at this fond memory.

Tonight when we got home from our errands, it was time for bed. The little boys came in the bathroom and began the nightly routine. All of the sudden Dallin was head back, belly laughing! After a little bit I finally understand what was so funny. Dallin has a brown monkey beanie baby. He had this monkey's little mouth on his little penis and was laughing about how the monkey was going to drink the water. This is not something Dave or I taught him! This is an outrage to both of us!

Dave and I explained that kind of behavior is not ok! But non the less.... the moral of the story is this.... Boys come hard wired to be perverts! It's nothing in their upbringing, they are just perverts. But perverts or not, I still love them.

Trials of the muffin tops

I am pretty sure no one cares how fat I feel. However I if I'm going to blog, it's going to be a real representation of my thoughts and feeling.

What the heck? Why can't I stop eating? I was doing just fine, working out and eating sort of reasonable. Then for some reason I fell off the wagon. I went from running around 25 miles a week, to thinking about running 5 miles a week. Only to make up for the lack of exercise I have decided to up my caloric intake by eating any sweets that pass with in 100 feet of me! At first this didn't seem to affect me, however I woke up this week and my butt had grown, A LOT! I keep thinking my box of fat clothes doesn't look so fat any more. Am I the only person who does this to them self? I love peanut M&M's! Some how in my head I have decided that the peanuts in the M&M's makes them ok to consume in mass amounts.

The solution? The only solution I can think of is to once again join good old weight watchers. This company has taken a lot of my money over the last 18 months. However I am very motivated by standing in front of that tiny women who has lost like 150 pounds and looks like a bird. I never stay for the meetings, I pay the money so I can stand in front of the bird women each week and get weighed.

I am also going to have to go back to the gym! Let me tell you about the only gym in Eagle River Alaska. It's 60 bucks a month for a basic one person membership. It is an additional 6 bucks a day to put my kids in the child care program. Adding up to usually around 160 bucks a month on the gym. It is the smallest and the dirtiest gym I've ever been in! I hate it! Everything about it! But when I went I was the size I wanted to be and loved to go clothes shopping. Now if some one tried to get me to go shopping I would give them a very nasty look and then politely decline. I am not happy with my body.

So how did this happen? Well first we went on vacation, that never helps. But I did ok coming out of that. Then I was running so dang much that I really could eat what ever I wanted and not gain weight. Then I started to break my no eating at work rule. Then I stopped running and started really eating at work. I've got to stop eating at work. I've really only gained 10 pounds from my smallest, but it feels like 30.

Solution? Dave has to leave again! No not really. But when he is gone I'm like a machine. I have complete control over what I eat and I work out two hours a day and don't even think it's a big deal! But when he is home I just have this need to eat what ever I want. Hopefully I'll pull it together soon. I have to pull it together soon. I'm really not happy with my self.

On a better note, my son Abraham turns 5 tomorrow! How crazy is that? Who said it would be ok for me to have a 5 year old? The crazy part about Abe being 5 is that he has no idea I have no business being his mother. I just keep waiting for the day when some government agency will show up at my door and tell me the experiment is over and take him away. This of course would would make very sad, but I've been expecting it for years.

I love Dave. I say this about 100 times a day. Lately I've been taking my self loathing out on him. The other day I tried to talk him into leaving me. I'm sure glad he didn't take me up on it. I really got lucky when I snagged that guy.

I give in!

I have been whole heartedly against blogging! But I miss my friends from Pullman so much that I am finally giving in. I really enjoy looking at their blogs, so I will make one of my own.

Dave and I live in Eagle River Alaska with our two sons and a naughty dog. Our oldest son turns 5 very soon and his name is Abraham. Our younger son is 3 his name is Dallin and he turns 4 in July. Our dogs name is Scout. She is the prettiest boxer I've ever seen. However she is very sneaky! Most days I hope she gets eaten by a bear. If a bear would just eat her it wouldn't be my fault and she would stop shedding in my house. It's natural selection baby! Every time she gets out of the house she runs away from us. She thinks it's a fun game, only it's not fun. She is FAST, neither Dave or I can catch her. Anyway every time she breaks out of the house I yell at her to go get eaten by a bear. I always thought I was a dog person... I was wrong.

Having said all that about the stupid dog.... the boys adore her! They play all day long with her and Dave loves her as well. I like her and all I just can't wait till she is really old and has hip dysplasia. Maybe then she will stop getting on my couch when I'm not home.

Abe is such a sweet little boy. He really is one of the most caring and sweet children I've ever come in contact with. He deeply cares about everyone he knows. I am so pleased with the little man that he is.

Dallin started this life as the spawn of the devil. But now has developed into a very pleasant child. All of our family that knew him as a baby is now very impressed with who he is now. He loves trains, mainly that creepy little Thomas. What is it with that train? Why do kids like him so much? Did you know Alac Baldwin is the narrator for all those Thomas shows? What a sell out.

David is so wonderful! He is still plugging along in the Army. He will be trying out for Special Forces some time soon. I am so proud of him. When I married David I thought I was getting a pretty good deal. It turns out I got a GREAT deal. He is my rock, he is so much stronger then me. If I would just follow the example David sets I would be a much better person then I am. I am so lucky to even know David, let alone be his wife.

I work at Prudential Jack White Vista Real Estate in Eagle River Alaska. Real Estate is the perfect job for me. I love people and I love houses! I get to work with people and help them into houses! I wish I would have thought of this years ago. I really do love my job. My office is awesome! Real Estate is a dog eat dog industry, but it doesn't feel like it in my office. Everyone is super supportive of me and in general everyone gets along really well. I love my job.

Well that's enough for one day. I'll try to figure out how to post pictures now. I know thats what people really want to see.